True Confession!

Well, here it is.  I watch The Biggest Loser.  I've never watched a whole season and I don't plan my day around watching the show, but I do enjoy watching it when I am home and feel like putting my feet up.  My first reaction to The Biggest Loser was...what? what will they think of next!? But then I watched an episode or two and found it to be actually pretty good.  The thing with this reality series is that the contestants on the show don't appear to be back stabbing conniving greedy people.  The contestants are supportive of their fellow competitors and seem to be genuinely happy to see them succeed.  This is something you don't find on many other reality shows.  The concept of The Biggest Loser is universal.  The show promotes The Biggest Loser Lifestyle, not a diet or a fad, but a lifestyle.  When these contestants convert to the BL lifestyle, they find themselves succeeding in areas, (weigh loss, nutrition, exercise) that they never thought they would ever succeed before.  It is really interesting to see the changes in people and I find it kind of inspiring.  Obviously we don't see what goes in behind the scenes, but what the producers choose to show the audience is good stuff to me.   This can be translated to areas of my life that need improvement.  I won't go into all of that, but let's just say that the concept of making a lifestyle change is often daunting and it takes real courage and strength to do it.  I also get some tips from the show. . . .
So that is my confession, I watch The Biggest Loser. 

What else is in the news...well, after over a year of battling with this leg issue that had now turned into it's own entity in my life, I've tried yet something else.  Let me review this history of this nagging pain.
Early January 2010- Ran Bandera 100k, no leg issues, didn't know one was coming
Later in January 2010-What the hell is that painful sensation in my right thigh when I try to run, its like I can't lift my leg
Rest of January-March 2010-Ignore the problem, it will go away.  This did NOT work, but I still managed to run some races with increasing amounts of pain. Managed 104 miles at PacRim with much discomfort.  Although, I think I would have felt discomfort REGARDLESS at PacRim, even if I were healthy....running in a 1 mile loop on a gravel path for about 22 hours....
March 2010-went to see a sports med Dr.  Got an x-ray, no diagnosis, just wonderment as to where this pain originates from, but got a referral for Physical Therapy and Active Release Therapy.
March-June 2010- No success with PT, some success with ART, but still running with the weird unknown pain, (why didn't I stop?  Because I'm silly) Still ran some races, withdrew from others, trained the best I could but felt compromised
June -August 2010-Continued with ART, started Heller Work, my training was still really sporadic and limited. Heller Work did NOT work, didn't really make a difference in the long run that I noticed
August -September 2010-Got through some races, some I finished, one I didn't, disappointed and frustrated
September -October 2010-REST. Very minimal running and activity in general.  I did things that didn't cause the usual pain.  Took a yoga class for 6 weeks, had some awesome massage from Leah Kangas.
October 2010-Present- Started back slow to building up miles.  No relief.  Still have this leg pain.  Started pilates with the amazing Echo Norris.  Some relief from this.
Wednesday April 13-Went to get acupuncture, why not?  I've tried pretty much everything.  The ND sees me and she orders me up and MRI right away. She said I'll run to produce the symptoms and then they will put my in claustrophobia land.
Saturday April 16th-Ran 12 summits and I sucked!  But besides that, the company of Sara and Eric and Struth was great!  Photo courtesy -Sara Malcolm

Last Summit of the day....phew

I had anxiety dreams before 12 summits and wondered if it was just plain stupid to run.  It's kind of remote once you get past the hikers hut on Tiger 1.  If I had to turn around, then that would have been along solo trip back to the car. Once we hit snow on the 4th summit I though, oh, maybe they will want to turn around and call it a day.  But no, I was running with tough peeps so that option was not even mentioned....  I was having a hard time keeping up all day.   The whole 12 summits my pain level was between a 3 and an 8.  So I am just being plain dumb for continuing to put myself in the position?  If not dumb, than at the very least, insane.  What is the definition of insane?

insane (ɪnˈseɪn)

— adj

1. a. mentally deranged; crazy; of unsound mind

b. ( as collective noun; preceded by the ): the insane

2. characteristic of a person of unsound mind: an insane stare

3. irresponsible; very foolish; stupid

This might apply to me.  I think it does. 
 I know every runner goes through this...they want to run, wonder if by running the damage will be worse.  Can I run through this?  What if I miss a long run, how does that set my back?  It's stressful and time consuming.  So I've decided that when I get the results of this MRI back, I will make a decision about whether or not I will finish out this season with the races I have signed up for or if I will take the rest of the season off.  We'll see. . . . either way I will be out their supporting my friends. 
Until the MRI results come back, I'll continue the insanity!